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August 19, 2004
Ted Kennedy is a Terrorist!!!
I knew it.
US senator Kennedy complains of falling on anti-terror no-fly list
Seriously though, this is the funniest thing I have read all year. Of all liberal Democrats to pick on, they picked the fat, drunk one who gets really, really red-faced when he gets mad.
And by the way, c'mon...you all KNOW this was a practical joke that was deliberately done from the WhiteHouse; I could just see Rumsfeld, Ashcroft, Bush, Cheney, Ridge, & Karl Rove sitting around playing poker one night (they are probably letting Bush win of course) and they start talking homeland security stuff with Ridge, yadda yadda yadda...Rumsfeld takes another swig of brandy and...
the lightbulb goes on.
"Hey Tom, you're the big cheese for Homeland Security, right?"
"Sure, Don...you know I am...why do you ask?"
"Well, you control any name that goes on or off a 'terror watch' list, right?"
"Sure, just the other day I was able to get those Arabs crossing from Mexico added--you could pick their truck out with that extra supply of towels."
Rumsfeld puts his cards down and everyone stares intently at him.
"What are you thinking, Don?" asks Karl Rove.
"Well, wouldn't it be pretty hilarious, if, uh, I dunno, Teddy Kennedy's drunk ass 'accidentally' made it onto the list? Could that happen?"
Everyone sat dead silent at the table. All of a sudden, Bush burst out laughing; the rest followed.
(In between fits of laughter and falling out of his chair) "Don, that would be wrong!" said Ridge as he starts laughing uncontrollably.
"Tell you what, Tom, if I beat you with this hand, you have to put Kennedy on...if you win the hand, you can leave Kennedy alone and put Michael Moore on instead."
At that point the room was howling with laughter.
Ok, I was having WAY too much fun with this, and yes, I am still leaning towards Kerry this November...BUT, Ted Kennedy is a boil on the ass of America, a guy guilty of being a lecherous, lying drunk who killed his mistress and he's known for his ranting, screaming red faced attacks against anyone who doesn't agree with him. He kind of DESERVES it--sorry, he does.
It's just funny because I can totally see Kennedy getting outraged more & more each time at every airport and you just know his name was on there deliberately as a GOP prank. Funny stuff. I would almost vote for Dubyah for that reason alone.
This will teach Teddy boy from stealing those little scotch bottles and pinching flight attendents behinds!
Posted by Mac Thomason at August 19, 2004 09:41 PM
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Tracked on September 28, 2004 11:40 AM